“When the world pushes you to your knees, you’re in the perfect position to pray. Though the path may seem dark now, remember that God uses our struggles to lead us to brighter destinations.”
The quote above summarizes what is happening in my life. It’s funny, that this would be my very first post, but I think it is still so fitting. As of the moment, my life may appear to have so many challenges, but I believe that one day when I look back at this time, I’ll be grateful that it happened.
In an unexpected turn of events during the time of COVID, it led me to find solace and shelter with my former boss (couple). What began as a professional relationship soon transformed into something much deeper and more familial. Thousands of miles away from my own family, this unexpected chapter in my life saw me not just in a different home, but amidst people who, over time, began to feel like my own kin. They are more like my second parents here in the US.
Living with this couple was, for the most part, a harmonious experience. Our days had a familiar and comforting rhythm, marked by shared meals, long conversations, and mutual learning. Their wisdom, especially that of the wife, who began to feel much like a mother to me, guided me. I found solace in our shared moments, and her understanding nature made me feel seen and valued.
However, like any household, there were complexities. The husband’s son (the wife’s stepson), a divorcee, also shared the home. Our dynamics were starkly different. While I felt a maternal bond with the wife and respected the husband, navigating my relationship with their son was a challenge. We had our differences, and at times, it felt like walking on eggshells. But it was an essential part of the experience, teaching me patience, understanding, and the art of coexistence amidst disagreements.
Each interaction, whether smooth or fraught with tension, was a lesson. It reminded me that every household has its own intricate web of relationships, and learning to find one’s space and peace within that is an art in itself.
Every chore I did, every errand I ran, wasn’t just about fulfilling my end of the unspoken arrangement—it was a gesture of gratitude. It was my way of saying “thank you” for their generosity, for the emotional support, and for the warmth they extended to me during such trying times.
Nearly three years have passed since I first stepped into this home, and a voice inside me whispers that it’s time to embark on a new chapter. The initial comfort and sanctuary I felt have slowly morphed into a cage of expectations. At times, the demands of this home make me feel as though my world should only exist within these four walls, overshadowing my own aspirations and other commitments. The essence of ‘home’ has faded, replaced with a growing restlessness and a yearning for change.
Earlier, I had communicated to the wife my intention to leave by year’s end. However, a sudden change in atmosphere made it clear that the husband had different timelines in mind. Unexpectedly, he expressed a wish for me to leave almost immediately – within a day’s notice. The abruptness of this caught me off guard, and I pleaded for a month’s grace to organize my belongings and secure a new place to stay. Although I received no direct response, I chose to interpret their silence as acquiescence.
The catalyst for this sudden upheaval wasn’t some grave wrongdoing on my part, but rather a mere miscommunication around scheduling. Cleaners were set to come with barely a day’s notice, and due to prior commitments – a speaking engagement for young adults and a church visit the next day – I couldn’t oversee their work. This seemingly trivial scheduling conflict unfortunately became a breaking point. The husband’s message was clear, if gently phrased: he wished for me to leave them be. The subsequent text message, instructing me to leave the keys with his son, further solidified the urgency of his decision.
You might be curious about the storm of emotions inside me at that moment. Surprisingly, calmness washed over me, accompanied by a sense of relief. Yes, there was a nagging fear about the security of my belongings and the looming possibility of them being unceremoniously discarded. But why was I calm amidst this whirlwind? I genuinely felt this was God’s divine intervention, nudging me out of my comfort zone, urging me to truly shine. The environment had become a cozy cocoon, holding me back from striving harder, from unlocking my full potential, and from achieving the financial independence needed to house myself.
While the unfolding events saddened me, my heart clung to the belief that God has grander plans for me. I won’t be leaving this chapter of my life with bitterness, but with a heartfelt goodbye.
After work today, an instinct nudged me to pick up a book from my shelf. The words on its pages resonated deeply, making me chuckle. It felt as if God Himself was speaking directly to me, comforting and reaffirming that my current predicament is just a twist in His greater narrative. The book spoke of pain, discomfort, and challenges, but also of unwavering faith. Those first three pages brought solace in ways words can’t describe.
I’m at peace, surrendering my next steps and lodging to God’s plan. While I gear up to boost my income and potentially rent a room, balancing expenses and debts, I remain hopeful about the future. Will I be alright? Deep down, I know I will be. My recent forays into Digital Marketing and digital product creation hint at exciting prospects. While considering YouTube, I’ve decided to explore TikTok first, mastering SEO and identifying my niche (I’ve got something exciting in mind but who knows!). The road ahead might be rocky, and tomorrow’s promises remain unknown. But my focus remains on the present, making necessary changes, and taking actionable steps for a brighter tomorrow. I’m committed to persevering, ever-conscious that success might be just around the corner.